I would never crash a wedding in real life. But virtually? On Instagram? I do it every weekend. How we all became virtual wedding crashers.
Remember that episode in season
three of Sex and the City, when Carrie Bradshaw famously notes, "Sunday
is the one day a week you get the single woman's sports pages: The New York
Times wedding section"? If Carrie Bradshaw were still narrating episodes
of Sex and the City today, she’d be talking about stalking wedding hashtags
on Instagram. Tap on a hashtag and instantly you’re there: At a castle in Italy
at the wedding of some socialite; getting a glimpse of the bride’s wedding
dress (even before the groom?); watching a video of the bride and groom’s first
dance. Maybe you snuck a peek at Lena Dunham as a Reformation-wearing, Heidi
braids-sporting bridesmaid a week ago at her best friend, artist Isabel
Halley’s, wedding (#inthesewoods)? You’re not the only one.
In the last few years, having a
wedding hashtag has become as common as sending out a Save the Date. According
to TheKnot.com and Mashable’s 2014 #SocialWeddingSurvey, out of over 1,000
couples polled, 55% reported using a wedding hashtag. In 2012 just 20% of
couples said they used a wedding hashtag. Before that, wedding hashtags were
unheard of, says Anja Winikka, site director for TheKnot.com.
“I think for brides of my
generation, it’s the easiest way for guests to share photos and for the bride
and groom, it’s fun afterward to go through and relive it all through photos
from their guests,” says Natalie Boggs, 27, a business development director at
Hilldun, who got married last October. “The day goes by so fast and you miss so
many of the details, so the photos give you a chance to experience some of
that. Professional photos also take a while to get back, so there’s the instant
gratification that also comes from using a hashtag.”
The bridal party is also getting
involved. "I created one for my sister's wedding, and as a perpetual
bridesmaid, it's a great way to share pictures from the bachelorette to the
main event,” says Chloe Thompson, 31, quickly hedging, “Am I naive?”
Nope. Wedding hashtags have
become so prevalent that brides are even looking to wedding hashtags for
research and inspiration. “I almost preferred looking through photos of a
wedding hashtag for inspiration than I did Pinterest and magazines,” says
Boggs.
And she’s not alone. Even for
those who are not brides-to-be, going down a wedding hashtag rabbit hole has
become a weekly time suck for many young women (more than a few of whom work
for ELLE.com). I, personally, waste many more minutes on any given Sunday than
I wish to disclose by tapping on the wedding hashtag of a
socialite/model/acquaintance. All of a sudden I’m there, virtually attending a
stranger’s wedding from dozens of different (and oftentimes very personal)
vantage points.
.jpg "weddings this summer")
“I have passively attended about
50 weddings this summer,” ELLE.com’s own fashion editor Danielle Prescod says.
“Wedding hashtags are brilliant because you click through one and, magically,
it opens up Pandora’s box—who was there, what they wore, what they ate, what
the bride’s dress looked like, how tall the groom is relative to the bride, and
my favorite: what his brother looks like.”
Creepy? Sure, a little.
And there is a backlash brewing.
Winikka cites weddings where guests are asked to check their phones at the door:
No social media allowed. (This tactic is perfect for famous people and the
bride who doesn’t want an unflattering photo making the rounds.)
And there go my next
1,123,098,123 weekends.
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